The city's local economy received a timely boost this week with the news that Riverside's Odeon cinema is poised to make Norwich the richest city in the land via the unfeasibly expensive sweets it hawks from its foyer.  At £1.10 per 100 grams, you might think you were buying Beluga or Bulgari jewelry, if not the whole of Bulgaria - but no. What you get for your money is a ragbag of vividly coloured jelly shapes which - though they might look like red octopi - were once the hooves of maudlin cattle.

Prominent local scientist Walter Flump explained the reasons for the boost to the local economy. Speaking loudly and slowly, he noted that oil is “expensive to produce, whereas unless the Odeon have pick 'n' mix rigs out in the North Atlantic where grown men labour with enormous drills in difficult conditions to prize these novelty jelly sweets from the earth - and I don't think they do - the cost of production is much much much much less.”

A spokesman for the Odeon did in fact confirm there are no pick and mix rigs in the North Sea, which was a relief to us all. However, the nightmarish cost of these cinematic treats is making some local families lives a misery. Kathy Blenkinsop from Olive Crescent, New Costessey, explained how her kids were seemingly addicted to these sugary treats, with dire consequences for the family purse.